{Prompt: Write a story about your time in college at NC State}
My life as an undergraduate student was a bit of a mess.
For one thing, I started off by majoring in Engineering at Vanderbilt University. I felt, after half a semester, that I wasn’t in the right field or the right university, and so I transferred to N. C. State University, back in my home town, and I changed my major to Pre-medical (Zoology).
Side Hustles
For another thing, I was working a variety of part-time jobs (both in college and medical school).
I worked at Burger King during the summer right after high school, and I didn’t know much about customer service. Once, I had the audacity to ask some seated customers to lift up their feet so I could sweep under their table. The manager gave me an earful, but he didn’t fire me. He needed workers to assemble the burgers — flame-grilled burgers.
Later, I worked at Arby’s, during the summer of 1983. We used to make ourselves miniature “Jamocha” shakes and miniature “Super” roast beef sandwiches for lunch (sandwiches with Arby’s barbecue sauce), but we never paid for them. Everyone did it.
Everything was great until management hired a firm to conduct polygraph (lie-detector) exams on everyone, supposedly because of a missing bank deposit. I didn’t really worry, because I knew nothing about any misappropriation of funds, but I discovered that it didn’t matter — it was really a ploy to screen out any and all employee misbehavior.
It was the most personally intrusive experience that I had ever had. Basically it was an interrogation, including questions along the lines of, “Have you ever done anything wrong?” and “What else should we know?” I felt like a criminal. Even worse, I felt like a sinner — the scourge of society.
I’ll never take a polygraph again if I can help it. No… Let me rephrase that… I’ll never take a polygraph again. Period.
An image capturing the gist of my polygraph experience.
Despite my questionable ethics, I got a job working for Raleigh Parks & Recreation at Pullen Park pool, and then at Optimist Park pool, and later at Biltmore Park as the pool manager. (I write about this in another story.)
And before I went to medical school, I spent about 8 months working at Harris Teeter grocery store in the deli department.
Living Quarters
My odd jobs weren’t the only things in flux. My living quarters kept changing as well. I started in a single room at a dorm at Vanderbilt, but when I transferred to State, I ended up sharing a room… with the worst roommate in the world. This fellow was on the wrestling team at NC State, and he had virtually zero interest in his classwork. I honestly don’t know if he even took any classes. He never seemed to do any homework, and he was a total ‘wanker’ (to borrow a bit of British slang). He was dating two girls at the same time, and asking me to cover for him. After one semester with him, I decided it was better to live at home and commute.
That was also the wrong decision. The next semester — the Fall of 1983 — I had an Advanced Lifesaving class first thing in the morning. Early in the morning. I found myself driving to class and rushing to get changed and jump into the pool, sometimes with only a meager breakfast… or no breakfast at all.
We once had a test that required us to tread water for a set period of time, with our hands in the air. I think I nearly drowned myself, because I was running on fumes.
As the weather got colder, and the days got shorter, it got harder and harder to make that trek up Oberlin Road first thing in the morning.
Treading water test - the worst!
So the following semester, I applied for a room in the International dorm — Alexander Hall. Like Turlington, it was right in the middle of campus — no more commuting from miles away, parking in a “fringe” parking lot, running to classrooms all over campus, and sleeping between classes on the sofas in the student union.
And it seemed unlikely that I would be rooming with a buffoon or a scoundrel. As it turns out, my first roommate, from China, could barely speak English. He ended up hanging out mostly with his friends. And I hung out with my friends all around the dorm.
Alexander Hall (credit: Dreamstime.com)
International Relations
In 1984 (Spring and Fall), I made some good friends at Alexander Hall, and my undergraduate experience started to run a little more smoothly. I met folks from India (Shantanu, Paru, and Srini) and France (Michel and René).
Srini and I became close friends, because he was so outgoing and energetic, but also savvy and supportive. (Our lives became intertwined as we both stayed in Raleigh after graduating from NC State. He lived in my house for a while when I was overseas, and I lived in his house for a while with his family when I returned. More on that later.)
I first learned to play volleyball at NC State, and we put together a pretty good indoor volleyball team for Alexander Dorm in intramurals. We had good players from abroad including Michel, Rene, and Srini. And then there was me, a novice. All I had to do was try to pass the ball halfway straight, and do a little blocking. Our team easily won the league, while my volleyball skills improved.
I met a girl from England, named Nooshin Ansari. She and her father came originally from Iran, and she was a member of the Baha’i Faith, as I discovered. While living in England, she enrolled at Plymouth Polytechnic, and attended NC State on a student exchange. She was attracted to me, and I was attracted to her. Within a few weeks we were going steady.
Nooshin Ansari
While I was dating Nooshin, Srini was dating Jane Matthews, a girl from Stokesdale, North Carolina, who was majoring in textiles. She was a wonderful person, and just as Southern as I was. The four of us would go out together, to restaurants like Two Brothers or Two Guys (right next door) on Hillsborough Street. (Both of their walls were covered with N.C. State athletic memorabilia.) We probably went bowling once or twice at the bowling alley, on the same block.
We would go see the second run movies for free with other students at Stewart Theater on campus, or go watch the new releases, out in the city, at Mission Valley or at Southpoint Mall. This was in 1984, before Blockbuster had even opened — before Redbox and Netflix had their day in the sun. Going out for a movie was the thing to do. You paid $3.50 apiece (in cash, at the window), got some soda and some snacks, and went looking for a group of comfy seats in the dimly lit auditorium.
A scene from Purple Rain - released in 1984
Or we would hang out in the basement of Alexander, where international dinners sometimes took place. Usually there was a little slideshow or a presentation by a member of that country, and then some delicious ethnic food was served.
Speaking of dinner—we probably went to the Madrigal dinner together, at one of the banquet halls in the student union. It was put on by students in the drama department.
Life was pretty good. And then I had to go and spoil it by going off on an international student exchange.
Going Abroad
Let me explain. NC State had an office for students applying to go overseas on an international student exchange. I’m pretty sure I found this office and filled out an application for the International Student Exchange Program (ISEP) within months of my arrival on campus in 1983. I had barely arrived on North Carolina soil before I was looking for a way to leave again.
Although my application was in order and met all the criteria, my request for an exchange was denied. Folks from the office kindly met with me, sympathetic to my interest in a study abroad, but as they explained, I had only been at NC State for a semester. I should try again later.
An International Student ID Card
So a year later, I applied again. I was applying to go study in Australia, where the school year is from February to November, so my application was due in October (1984), more or less. I was probably lured to Australia by my childhood infatuation with Olivia Newton-John. Or maybe I was just looking for an English-speaking country with marsupials on the other side of the world. I really had no good reason to go on a student exchange program. I just wanted adventure.
This time my application was approved. And, as it turned out, Australia had a trimester schedule of classes, so I would not be able to easily go for one semester. I would have to go for a whole year. “Fantastic,” I thought.
One more catch — the classes would only be able to count as electives. I had to do all of the required (Biology and Zoology) courses for my degree on campus at NC State — a capricious and self-serving rule, in my mind. Could I do it and still graduate on time? As it turns out, I could.
Fortunately, I had been packing my semesters with 15 to 18 credit hours of courses. I was already ahead of schedule. I could afford to take a year of “elective” classes in Australia.
I found this all out in November of 1984— that I had been accepted to attend Flinders University in Adelaide, South Australia, and I would be going for the full school year, from February to November of 1985. I would have to fly to the other side of the world in just about two months.
Departure
I was thinking about all these things, when I went out to dinner with my girlfriend, Nooshin, and my friends, Srini and Jane. We were all talking about other things — nothing in particular — before a lull in the conversation. So then I piped up and told them that I had just heard back from the office for international student exchange.
Nooshin gave me a quizzical look and said, “I didn’t know you had applied for a student exchange.”
Have you ever thought, “Surely, I mentioned that.” or “Didn’t I say that out loud?” or “I thought everyone knew.” Those thoughts went through my head, as I searched for the right words to say.
“Didn’t I tell you?” I said.
“No,” she said, with eyebrows raised.
[But wait, it gets worse.]
I apologized profusely for my egocentric idiocy.
Then she asked, “So when do you go?” She’s wondering if I will still be around in the Spring semester — her last semester in the States.
“I have to leave in January.”
Another look of bafflement.
“So where are you going?” she said. She’s wondering if I am going to England, her home country.
“It’s in South Australia… Adelaide, South Australia… For nine months.”
Now, she herself is speechless.
This really happened. I’m not making it up.
Needless to say, Nooshin and I had a candid discussion after that, about my plans (or lack thereof), and about my communication skills. We worked it out to a degree, but I kind of left her in a state of uncertainty. I must have promised to see her again and promised to write.
But at the time, in January of 1985, I left her, my friends, and my family behind, and I went off to spend a year in Australia. It wasn’t the first time — I did the same thing in 1980, when I went to the NC School of Science and Math in Durham. And it wasn’t the last time — I did it again when I took a year off from Duke Med to go to the UNC School of Public Health in Chapel Hill.
But it was certainly the most impertinent parting, for the offhanded way that I treated Nooshin — someone who probably expected much more from me — someone who deserved better.
Down Under
Flinders University and Australia in 1985 were everything that I imagined, and more. I made friends, not only from Australia but also from Malaysia and Western Samoa—two other countries that sent students to Australian universities.
I won’t go into the details here (I write about it elsewhere), but I learned to appreciate Australian “Footy” and cricket, I enjoyed Foster’s Ale and Pie Floaters, I played “varsity” basketball, I walked on the Great Barrier Reef off the coast of Queensland, and I drank more than I should have (but less than most Aussies).
Before I returned, I promised myself that I would go back, not only to Australia, but to Malaysia, and Western Samoa, as well.
Flinders University - Adelaide, South Australia
Challenger
When I did return to NC State, in 1986, everything had changed. I returned to Alexander Hall, but Nooshin had returned to England, Srini and Jane were no longer dating, and there was an entirely new group of students living in my old dorm.
On January 28, I was just walking around the hall, passing time. Somewhere on the first floor a door was open and a TV was on. Someone I knew was watching the preparations for the launch of the Space Shuttle, Challenger, so I popped in to see if the launch would actually happen. It had been delayed twice already.
NASA was going to send Krista McAuliffe into space — the first teacher in space. She’d been in the news for weeks. So I thought I’d take a moment to watch a little bit of history in the making.
We heard a bit of commentary about the unseasonably cold weather. Some discussion of the previously scrubbed launches — the day before… and the day before that. Color commentary. Nothing special.
And then the launch began. It was spectacular. Massive jets of rocket fuel propelling the shuttle skyward. Bird’s-eye views of the rocket launch, with support arms from the towers, falling away.
Pretty soon the shuttle was nothing but a speck at the end of a long plume of propellant in the clear blue sky.
But then, the disaster occurred — an explosion with scattering plumes of smoke and projectiles spiraling across the atmosphere — erratic trails of debris.
Explosion of Space Shuttle Challenger on January 28, 1986
For a few seconds, unaware of the spectacle on the screen, the announcer continued reading from his script, announcing the altitude of the shuttle that was no longer there—anticipating the next booster release.
And then the commentary paused… for several seconds.
Then a new kind of commentary commenced.
“Wait a moment. I think there’s been an explosion… Is that possible?”
And a moment later,“I don’t see how anyone could have survived such a blast.”
No one knew if they were living or dead.
We hoped… of course, we hoped… they survived, in the capsule — that they would be rescued at sea. But as the day unfolded, it became clear that they all had perished. Six American astronauts and one civilian payload specialist — a teacher turned astronaut, named Christa McAuliffe.
Our faith in NASA, and our memories of their stunning achievements in the race for the moon, were erased that day — replaced by horror and sadness.
Summer Holiday
While I completed my degree at NC State in 1986, I took advantage once more of my relationship with the student exchange office, by applying for a work exchange in England in the summer. It would be part work, part holiday.
I had kept in touch with Nooshin, mostly by sending letters by airmail, and she smoothed out the road for me, making it easy for me to find a job at an amusement park, with lodging near her home in Harrogate, North Yorkshire.
So off I went, first to see her in Plymouth, where she was attending Plymouth Polytechnic University and then to North Yorkshire. I joined her at her “flat” near campus, where we hugged—trying to reconnect.
On a shelf, I noticed a video in her small collection, called Summer Holiday, with someone named Cliff Richard.
“Who’s Cliff Richard?”, I said.
“You don’t know who Cliff Richard is? Really?”
“Nope.”
“You’ve never seen this movie?” I shook my head. “Oh, wow,” she said. “It’s the best movie in the world. You have to watch it.”
So we spent the evening watching Summer Holiday, with Cliff Richard crooning his way through Europe in a double decker bus. It was adorable. It was idealistic.
Sometimes English people will surprise you with a light-hearted musical.
A promotional poster for Summer Holiday
But Nooshin could sense my ambivalence. She could tell that although I admired her, I didn’t really love her.
She said the worst thing you can say to someone you haven’t seen for a while. She said, “You haven’t changed a bit.”
And she was right. I wasn’t much better than that first horrible roommate I had at NC State that I had judged to be so self-serving. I wanted it both ways. I wanted to have a girlfriend, and I wanted to do my own thing with no regard to others.
Bottom line — I wasn’t ready to give Nooshin what she wanted in a relationship. I wanted to go on exploring the world, meeting other people, and dating other girls.
So we parted ways, but not before I spent the summer staying in a flat that her father owned in Ripon, North Yorkshire. He let me stay there rent free even though I was breaking up with his daughter. It was awkward.
And I worked at the job that she had arranged for me at Lightwater Valley Amusement Park.
I saw her once or twice before I returned home, but we were no longer a couple. She stayed in England, and I returned to the US, “across the pond.”
And that was it. There was no internet or Facebook — no social media — to keep us in touch. It was international phone calls, letters, or nothing.
In the end, I did nothing to keep in touch. It was the end of our friendship and our fleeting romance. It would have been a bad ending for a musical.
Waiting In Limbo
After my return to the U.S., I was out of school for a year, waiting in limbo, before I was finally accepted to attend Duke Medical School in the fall of 1987.
During that year, I went to work full-time at Harris Teeter, a grocery store at Glenwood Village (about 3 blocks from my home). Srini was working there as a cashier and assistant manager. He helped me get a job in the Deli department.
After eight months, I applied for a job as a lifeguard with Raleigh Parks and Recreation. Instead, I was offered the position of manager at Biltmore Pool, where I spent the summer before medical school began.
It was three more years before I met my wife-to-be, Dianne Shihadi, at UNC School of Public Health. I met her when I took a year off from the grind of medical rotations — taking a little sabbatical from Duke, going off to Chapel Hill instead.
Schooling and Life
From the time I entered college in 1982, to the time I entered medical school in 1987, my life was a convoluted mess. I kept changing jobs. I kept changing universities. I kept moving around.
I couldn’t decide what I wanted, where I wanted to be, or who I wanted to be with.
I was impetuous. I was selfish. I was pretty immature.
I like to imagine that it was a time of learning and self-improvement, in and out of the classroom.
My time in college, preparing to live and work in society, wasn’t always a pleasant or straightforward affair.
Sometimes it was pleasant and fun. Sometimes it was unpleasant and confusing.
Sometimes life is smooth and goes according to plan.
Sometimes life is messy.
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Appendix I - Progression of Career Plans, College & Residency, Lodging, and Part Time Jobs from 1982 to 1995.
Majors: Engineering, Pre-Med (Zoology), Medicine, Public Health, Internal Medicine Internship, Family Practice Residency
Schools: Vanderbilt, NC State University (NCSU), Flinders University, NCSU, Involuntary Gap Year, Duke Medical School, UNC School of Public Health, Duke/UNC (completion of master’s paper), Montefiore Internship, USC–RMH Residency.
Living Quarters: Kissam Hall, Turlington Hall, Home, Alexander Hall, Uni Hall, Alexander Hall, Ripon flat, Home, Room in Srini’s House, Room in house on Dogwood Lane, room in house near Morreene Road, Room in house on McCauley Street, Room in Durham house and shared room at Ramsgate Apartments, Woodcroft duplex, One floor of Shadyside house, Columbia house.
Jobs: News & Observer (N&O), Burger King, Vanderbilt Security, Arby’s, Pullen Pool, Optimist Pool, N&O, Lightwater Valley Amusement Park, Harris Teeter Deli, Biltmore Pool Manager, Vine Vet kennel worker, N&O redelivery, Medical Intern, Medical Resident.
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Summer 1982
Work at Burger King
Fall 1982 - Kissam Hall at Vanderbilt
General Chemistry
Calculus AB
Engineering Principles (convinced me to leave Engineering)
Basic Graphics/Advanced Graphics
Logic (advanced my ability to construct a legitimate argument)
Work as Security Guard
Spring 1983 - Turlington at NCSU
English Composition & Rhetoric (required for every student at NCSU)
Intro to Psychology (required all students to volunteer for Psychology experiments)
Principles of Chemistry
Calculus BC
Physics (for Engineers. I withdrew before my GPA took a hit)
PE - Lifetime Fitness (required of every student. I tried too hard on the fitness test at the start, and failed to improve at the end)
Summer 1983 - Home
Work at Arby’s
Fall 1983 - Home, commuting to NCSU
English - Composition & Reading
Social Psychology (Human Behavior)
Organic Chemistry I
Invertebrate Zoology (feared by many for its difficulty, but I ended up with the best grade in the class)
Advanced Lifesaving (very practical, but physically exhausting)
PE - Archery, Soccer (best requirements to graduate from NCSU are the PE electives)
Working for N&O
Spring 1984 - Alexander Hall at NCSU
English - Creative Writing (a humbling experience in a class full of literati)
English - Studies in Fiction
Organic Chemistry II
Vertebrate Zoology
General Physics (for non-engineers. Best physics class ever.)
PE - Volleyball, Badminton (more great PE electives)
Working for N&O
Summer 1984 - Home
Work for Raleigh Parks & Recreation at Pullen Park.
Fall 1984 - Alexander Hall at NCSU
(This semester was filled with classes for my pre-med major.)
Biochemistry
Genetics (really fun class with a lab centered around fruit flies)
Microbiology
Histology
Vertebrate Physiology
Work for RP&R at Optimist Pool
1985 - University Hall at Flinders University in Adelaide
History of American Politics
Australian Multiculturalism
Other humanities elective that I’ve since forgotten
Virology
Immunology
Not working, for once!
Spring 1986 - Alexander Hall at NCSU
Ecology (so much fun that I wish I had known earlier)
Medical Microbiology,
Comparative Anatomy
Embryology
PE - 2 more electives
Working for Mr. Pate - N&O
Summer 1986 - Ripon, North Yorkshire
Work Exchange at Lightwater Valley Amusement Park
Fall 1986 - Home/ Srini’s house in Raleigh
Working full time at Harris Teeter in Deli department
Summer 1987 - Dogwood Lane in Raleigh
Working as Pool Manager at Biltmore Pool
Fall 1987-Spring 1988 - Near Morreene Road in Durham
Basic Sciences Year:
Anatomy
Pathology
Biochemistry
Pharmacology
Physiology
Microbiology
Diagnostic clinical exam, Histology
Summer 1988-Spring 1989 - Somewhere in west Durham
Duke Clinical Rotations:
Internal Medicine
Surgery
Pediatrics
Ob-Gyn
Psychology (and Child Psychology)
Fall 1989-Spring 1990 - McCauley Street in Chapel Hill
UNC Public Health Classes
Work for Vine Vet as Kennel Assistant/ N&O redelivery
Summer 1990 - Tempe, Arizona
Internship with ASU Department of Psychology
First master’s paper - “Primary Prevention of Psychopathology in Children with the Loss of a Parent” - Rejected.
Fall 1990 - Durham/Ramsgate in Carrboro
Duke Basic Sciences:
Epidemiology
History of Medicine
Another that I can’t recall
Spring 1991 - Fall 1991 - Ramsgate → Woodcroft in Durham
Duke Advanced Clinical Rotations:
Family Practice Clinic
Occupational Medicine
Geriatrics
Dermatology
Emergency Medicine
Other Internal Medicine and Pediatrics
Spring 1992 - Woodcroft in Durham
Second Master’s Paper - “Secondary Analysis in the Emergency Department Data” - Accepted
1992-1993 - Shadyside, Pgh, PA
Transitional Year Program
1993-1995 - Columbia, SC
USC-RMH Family Practice Residency.
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